wow, 2011 is nearly a wrap! what a tumultuous year it’s been, all full of sturm und drang. but hey! here it is, december, and i’m not blind.
for those of you who have had a traumatic, shitty year, remember — this too shall pass. to every season, turn turn turn. another day another dollar. you must sink to rise up. what i’m trying to say is, even if you’re not gay, it gets better. go buy yourself a scented candle and put on some good music and eat something delicious. make yourself a cocktail and then think how lucky you are that you have tastebuds, ear drums, and a nose. there are people who don’t! chalk it up to a learning experience and move on. ommmm…..
towards the end of each year i try to reflect on the preceding 365 days and evaluate things. i also try to clean out the pantry and fridge at least once a year as you would be shocked how quickly time flies for condiments. one day that bottle of ketchup is brand new, next thing you know it expired three years ago.
music
at any rate when i initially got the bug to write a blog i was going to comment on this blurb i read about how people today utterly lack taste vis a vis music. i mean, ke$ha selling more records than the beatles? for real? creed more popular than jimi hendrix? sure the population has nearly doubled but i also think that despite the wide and easy availability of music, this has done nothing but dilute the market to the lowest common denominator. which, we all know, has terrible taste in music (and everything else). sure it’s easy (and easier) to find great music, but first you have to know what great music is. clue: it’s not ke$ha.
anyway i happened to think 2011 was a pretty good year for music. you got your mikal cronin, ty segall, heavy cream, duchess says, no age, bleeding knees, bleached, thee oh sees, cold showers. then you got your reunions of DFA 1979, descendents, GbV and scratch acid. seriously, you need more? there’s plenty more. just stay away from mumford and sons, anything on kroq, and you’ll be fine.
food
just as 2011 gave us both the first mikal cronin record (yay!) and mumford and sons (boo, hiss!) 2011 also spawned a new awareness of food coupled with the amazing lack of doing anything about the new awareness of food. i think by now most people can wrap their heads around the idea that we all need to eat less (or no) meat, more fruits and vegetables (preferably organic), and cut fast and processed foods out of our lives.
so help me out here, people, you know what you need to do. michael pollan and mark bittman and that whole crowd have been ranting and raving for years on these subjects. chef after chef has written cookbook after cookbook trying to convince you that cooking is fun! cooking is easy! cooking does not have to be time consuming! cooking is healthier for you than eating mcdonald’s!
SO WHY AREN’T YOU DOING IT? seriously, what’s your excuse? and why the hell are you buying sandra lee’s crap and that terrible hungry girl cookbook, both of which rely heavily on processed or pre-prepared ingredients? why do you still eat garbage, when you know it’s bad for you?
parenthetically, by way of research i went on sandra lee’s website, where she has a recipe for something called smothered chicken which starts with a rotisserie chicken you buy at the grocery store (so, a fully cooked, already done item) and THEN takes another 45 minutes to cook (after you murder i mean smother it with cans of cream of chicken soup). how on earth is this a time saver? i actually made the same dish from scratch and it took a little bit longer, but of course was a thousand times better and healthier.
people… i know you’re not going to make chicken stock from scratch (pity, because it’s easy and great). but for the love of god, stop being so goddamn lazy and cook yourselves dinner. IT TAKES 10 MINUTES.
for those of you who do cook, i made a concerted decision this year to expand my repertoire. like probably everyone, i tend to fall back on the same favorites over and over again. given that i have hundreds of cookbooks, this is inexcusable. anyway after taking this little pledge i have to say that i think i’ve done pretty good. last night, for example, i made roasted cauliflower with mint and salted yogurt (didn’t have pomegrantes and forgot about the cumin). it was delicious! and easy! and healthy! a while back i also had a delicious salad (i can’t find a recipe on the web but it’s really intuitive) of shredded brussel sprouts in a vinaigrette with chopped nuts that’s super easy. and i tried to explore thai cuisine and discovered that you can pretty much put thai peanut sauce on anything and it’ll be good.
my easy thai peanut sauce
couple tablespoons peanut butter
cider or white vinegar
fish sauce to taste
red pepper flakes
sesame oil
hot chile paste
soy sauce
sugar
salt
chopped peanuts
sorry i do not know proportions and i never feel bound by them anyway. basically take the peanut butter and add the other liquids to it till you get it to the consistency you want. then add the seasonings to taste.
i’ve put this over noodles with cucumbers, cilantro, shrimp (or chicken) and red peppers for a quick (less than 15 minutes) meal. if you want to cook chicken fast, cut it into shreds and it’ll cook in a few minutes. shrimp is even faster.
ps for those of you who cook, a number of really good cookbooks came out this year. mark ruhlman‘s twenty has recipes for onion soup which does not require broth, and for making your own bacon. the citrus cured salmon is the same as in the french laundry cookbook but i recommend serving it ala ruhlman (shavings vs big chunk). lisa fain released the long-anticipated homesick texan cookbook, thus saving me the trouble of riffling through all the recipes i printed from her blog. i finally completed the time life series The Good Cook, and threw down some old classics like elizabeth davis’s conversational french provincial cooking and olney’s simple french. and i continue to be impressed by our foodie counterparts across the atlantic like nigel slater and hugh fearnley-whittingstall (and everyone else at river cottage). although every time i see the guardian take a crack at an american classic (like bbq) i have to laugh.
sarah lee can suck it. i’d rather make marcella hazan’s chicken cacciatore any day.
movies
i have seen a shitton of movies this year, most of which blew. this was as part of my concerted effort to See More Movies to avoid being mocked as someone who only watched movies with subtitles made by obscure hungarian directors. [what? i liked satantango.] i think i just did a free form haiku movie review so all i’ll add is this. spun sucked and was irritating. if you’re going to watch an anti-drug movie you might as well see that one with more sex. run lola run was pretty decent but the eurodisco soundtrack and cartoons made me want to drink. v for vendetta was decent. suicide club‘s “message” was annoying and incomprehensible and by the time they got around to trying to express it i didn’t even care what it was. wonderland was decent. the best movies i saw all year didn’t even come out this year: pan’s labyrinth and the devil’s backbone. in the world of tv (which i only watch via online streaming) the first season of arrested development was genius, but everything after the old man gets out of jail loses the thread. obviously colbert and daily show continue to rock but i really do wish they wouldn’t both cover the exact same stories day in and day out. if you are american you must immediately find the mighty boosh and spaced. trust me.
books
i can’t remember a goddamn thing i’ve read all year, practically. in one eye, out the other. i know i’ve read things but i don’t remember if they were this year or last. the problem i have with books nowadays is that they don’t seem to feel particularly important anymore. at best they’re interesting distractions (aka Shadow of the Wind). at any rate i vow, in 2012, to read more books off of my extensive list of Important Books To Read Before I Die. i’m pretty sure number one with a bullet is Joyce’s Ullyses, which i’m saving for when i retire and time virtually stands still.
in other news (no, seriously) i decided that i really need to dust off some of my more interesting stories for possible publication. remember captain crazy? ha ha! i laugh just thinking about it. so poignant yet humorous.
life goals, a recap
i know i said i’d climb mount whitney, but as it turns out that takes a lot of effort and frankly the final ascent looks terrifying. this was not going to be the year for this anyway, as i spent the entire summer battling blindness.* and laziness.**
* an exaggeration
** not an exaggeration
so last year i said i would make my goals more realistic and attainable. and wouldn’t you know it if by doing so, i blew them out of the water. in fact, this was the year i finally paid off a ticket from 2008! [hey kids! here's a tip for you -- don't wait three years to pay off a ticket! the penalties are a bitch!] none of my utilities were shut off! everything was paid more or less on time! much work was done around the house! mail was opened on a timely basis! dishes and clothes were put away! papers were organized!
wow, frankly i’m tired just reading all those accomplishments. and now that i cleaned out the basement, what’s left?
learning spanish. making my home actually look like the home of an adult as opposed to someone who just moved out of their parent’s place and is still buying shitty and mismatched furniture. ocean kayaking. camping. snow shoeing. writing. running more races. paddle boarding (not to be confused with water boarding). skateboarding. going to places i’ve never been before. game nights. pot lucks. hiking. avoiding inertia and getting fat and lazy. reading the newspaper. being informed. learning new things. getting together with friends. going to museums. listening to new music. helping people who need it, however i can. shit like that.
2012, i am ready for you. you will be my bitch.
if you quote that avril lavigne song, i will kill you
